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My fantasies are more along the line of a reality show with all members of the ERG, the EU-hating gutter press and ESPECIALLY Boris and 'Just call me' Dave dropped off on the Cook Islands in hurricane season filmed by the Black Mirror crew.
But then it goes all Lord of the Flies on me and I have to stop watching.
Variations include official openings of JRM's new finance company in Ireland and the merry good cheer of the local neighbours and a ticker tape parade in the City as the pound goes through the basement and a bunch of exiled Russian billionaires make trillions on FX put options, vodka flows in the gutters of Westminster.
Hilarity ensues as they proceed to buy the other masthead mainstream press prizes of Fleet St.
This one goes a bit too Stephen King/John Le Carré, involving Macron, Salvini and a tunnel through the Alps.
Then there's the dropping them off in leaky coracles in the North Sea to repel the Scary Migrant Invasion.
That one ends well, the migrants rescue our winsome (losemost) heroes and Teresa May weeps on camera as she contemplates the wealth and generosity of the racial diversity she had been so hostile to before.
She poses contritely, makeup running down her ruddy cheeks, wrapped in blankets surrounded by a group of jovial tropical visitors embracing her conversion and baptism in the icy waters.
Her husband jetted off to Saudi with family jewels intact.
See how everything always works out for the best in the end, children?
Now goodnight and sweet dreams of Albion and Camelot...
'The history of public debt is full of irony. It rarely follows our ideas of order and justice.' Thomas Piketty
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