I didn't want to write this diary, but the words just came out uncontrollably.

My favourite personal verbal blunder:

Several years ago, I was at my girlfriend's place and she had invited one of her friends over (a girl). I hadn't seen her friend in a few months, and so immediately noticed that her nose looked completely different. I immediately snapped "wow your nose looks really great! superb idea to have plastic surgery!". Which it didn't (ie. didn't look great), I was only being polite and blabbering the first thing that came to mind. The girl's reaction: "I fell off a horse".

I almost just blundered again. Called a friend a few minutes ago, and was about to come out with a trademark lousy joke when I noticed her voice was weird. She was at another friend's house, a friend who just learned her 22 year old daughter (cute, nice, did a few parties with her) died in a car accident. The second time this friend loses a child. That added to the other fatal car accident in my sphere this week (my friend on a bicycle), serves as a sad reminder that we must live every moment of our lives as best we can, for it can/will all end up abruptly. Jesus I hate cars.

a propensity towards talking before thinking

In a college class long ago the word harrass somehow came up in the conversation.  For reasons that escape me now, the conversation took a detour into the proper pronunciation of the word.  The prof claimed the proper pronunciation would obviously be harris.  I quicky replied that I always thought it looked like her ass.  For about four heartbeats the silence was deafening.

Some years ago my work took me into a particular electrical supply store fairly often.  The young woman behind the counter was attractive and personable but, shall we say, a bit on the pudgy side.  One day I went in the store for the first time after an absense of a couple of months.  I almost didn't recognize the young woman.  She had dropped a LOT of weight.  She looked positively svelt.  I looked at her with some concern and asked, "Wow, you've lost a lot of weight.  Have you been sick?"  She didn't answer and the look she gave me didn't invite any further conversation. Later a colleague told me she had just gone through one of those expensive, doctor supervised weight loss programs.

My wife says I have chronic foot in mouth disease.

We all bleed the same color.

I don't know how well this will translate, but I was talking to a friend's sister, and I called her "Amanda."  She corrected me and said her name was "Sarah." And I was like, are you sure?  (Obviously she knew here own name...)  She asked me why I thought her name was Amanda.
I told her because her brother once told me she had a doll named "Amanda" which she called "Demanda" when she was little and that the doll was named after her.

Does that make sense? He'd been remarking that she should be called "Demanda" and I didn't get it. And ended up making a fool of myself and getting him in big trouble too...

Ouch.  

Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities. -Voltaire

The Bulgarian word for love is "obich" which in English sounds like "oh bitch" ;-). I remember once I had difficulties convincing an American that I didn't mean to offend her by using this Bulgarian word in her presence.

And let me say that this is a great, great diary! Bravo for the idea!

I can resist anything but temptation.- Oscar Wilde

...dates back from a while ago: I was in my final year in my higher education and my entire family had left for a week to some destination, I can't remember where. I had been given the responsibility to take care of the parental house and the dog. Generally, the dog used to be very quiet, but at one night during that week, she decided to start barking once every two hours for some reason (I never found out why) and she'd keep going in her characteristic hoarse barks until someone came down the stairs to quiet her down. Thus, I found myself with a pretty wretched night and little sleep on school, where I had English in the first hour. My friend, sitting next to me, noticed I looked pretty haggard and I began to tell him what had happened the past night while the class was just rummaging away, waiting for the exercises to be handed out.

It was a good tale, I thought, and I was making very life-like impersonations of my dog's barking, when it suddenly dawned on me that things had become awfully quiet around me. And when I looked up and around I found the eyes of entire class (30 something plus the teacher!!!) resting on me, and all faces carrying extremely broad grins. I managed to murmur to my friend, "Well, I guess I tell you the rest during the break...." And the teacher came to my desk and berated me privately, but highly amused...

(W)oof!!

Ok can the person who voted Dr. Blunder reveal him/herself to us? We can start a few wagers on who it is in the meantime.